Months of indoor training and bad weather could not dissuade Jonah from leaving on what he thought would be a bushwhacking adventure along the Congo River.

Little did he know that preparation with a plastic machete would do him little benefit in the desert landscape siding the river once explored by Joseph Conrad. Inspired by his Heart of Darkness, Jonah’s voyage was to be one that would take him to the heart of Africa and would be relatively dry: likely no rain and even less beer to sate his Bud-craving gut.

Without a word, in person, Jonah took off from his suburban Sacramento bungalow, and made haste for the airport before the break of dawn. Stopping for a quick minute, en route to the airport, Sandy pulled over at Jonah’s sister’s home, letting him leave a final memento with his older sister. No time or care could be spared to speak in person, after Jonah’s drunken ramble at Aunt Rhonda’s funeral had all but cut the siblings’ ties.

Having tried to muster enough courage to speak to Carrie again, Jonah’s emotions failed him, sending him spiralling into his father’s former alcoholic ways, one day, giving way to the un-thought-out voyage into Africa. Impulse, once again, took over, silencing reason and a drunken lack of inhibition yielded a fateful phone call to Air California.

Sheer embarrassment, guilt, and remorse kept Jonah from looking Carrie in the eye, until arriving at her doorstep on the way to the airport, where she caught him off guard, thanks to a last second, middle of the night heads up from Sandy. Eyes locked, and heart racing, Jonah couldn’t find the words to say goodbye but summoned the strength to hand over his plastic machete with a farewell note scribbled on the last Polaroid ever to be taken of him.

Story by Max Levine-Poch


Peter Pan Night

Oh that was quite a night. Memories are faint, but I have to say this story is for as few ears as possible, especially not for our parents’, right sis?

So let’s see where to start. Well, the people who were there, those are some life long friends, college friends, high school buddies. So ya, I know, this picture leaves us with a lasting memory of my enactment of my time in Peter Pan. Oh, it was in 8th grade, my moment to shine when I had all the ladies wanting to talk to me, cause theatre was cooler than sports. All right, maybe not, but it did make me a fun person to party with. I always knew how to put on a show and entertain people till the early morning.

Well, sis, I know you passed out quite early on in the evening, so just to refresh your mind, you wouldn’t stop talking to me about wanting to hook up with my best friend, so I made sure that you had the chance, though you fucked it up by drinking too much too fast, but you did still manage to make a nice impression on him. Let’s just say you still went to bed with him, except he was much too kind and slept on the floor beside your bed since, well, it was a single bed from when you were 16, and yes, mom and dad do not need to know about that, cause you remember how they were about us having people over through high school. So hope this allows you to relive that moment as much as possible. Maybe next time pay more attention to my performance and less on the bottles and cans on the counter.

Story by Timothee

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