As I lay here in this bed that has held this body of mine for so many years, and the memories of not only my husband that held me in his arms while I slept, but this is where my first child was born.  It was a cold winter’s day, when I woke up so uncomfortable.  I was so young and did not know that I had been in labor for hours.  The pain became so unbearable that I could get out of bed.  I called for an ambulance, but before one arrived, Stella was born.  

Some of my best memories are here in this room.  Many nights my kids would crawl into bed with me because they had nightmares.  Other times we would snuggle and talk for hours.  Now I lay here day after day, night after night, only my memories to keep me company.   No one ever comes to visit me.  My husband has long since passed and my children are grown and live out of town.   What I would not give to go back in time and to change some things.  I would live life to the fullest each and every day.  I would not give so much of myself to my job, but give more of myself to my children.  I would insist on play days.  I would dance in the rain every chance I got.   I would treat my body like a temple and never would I put the poison in it such as these cigarettes that I could not give up and because of them I am being robbed of the quality of life I so crave.  Don’t get me wrong, I do not regret how I lived my life.   I just would have done things differently.  So for now, I lie here waiting for deaths door to open, so I can start my next life.  I hope it comes soon.

Story by Dianne Williams

Go top